Today the Supreme Court of the United States as the justices hear oral arguments in Obergefell v. Hodges. the outcome of this case could result in marriage equality becoming the law in all 50 states.
Prompting me to want to say a few things about equality, social, sex, same sex, etc. We are all people. However in a world of labels and power play going against the conventionally set standard can result in fear, backlash and slander. Basic humanity is so easily forgotten when our own all too human instinct to survive by trying to live by a ‘moral food-chain’.
Since I was a small child coloring in my art books I have never been able to see in such black and white terms. I bring up the drawings because I can remember my particular favorite thing to draw being people. With their disproportionately long necks, limbs and torsos. My mom used to say it was artistically unique…now I just say: I’m a writer. However the reason I liked to draw people was for the worlds I could create behind the “portrait,” the lives, the stories. I would extrapolate on one drawing, placing the same person in multiple pictures, some with their animals, some with their families, lovers and/or friends. Names, ages, likes, dislikes, all personality traits that could trace back to their upbringing – yes I was very detailed if not in feature than in mind and heart behind the squiggle of a lined-looped nose. One family I visited quite a lot just so happened to be a big family of seven or eight children varying in ages from small, tweens to teens. With two parents who loved one another very much. It just so happened that the father of this group was transitioning. For he had always identified as a woman, and now that his family was growing up, he felt it was a good time to embrace that part of himself. He was in love with his wife and she with him. This would not be a ‘broken home’ nor a harsh or negative process. It would not turn their world upside down, or tare the family apart. For the only change was going to be physical. Who he is was not going to change. The way he acts, the way he loves. Those are fundamental, a part of soul, it just so happens these come from a person who identifies as a woman.
I can remember having this inspiration behind my colored pencils, and asking if it were possible. That if they were in love and done having children they could stay together. No one could really give me a satisfying answer. Some laughed and said it would need some serious therapy to even consider working. Still I was unsatisfied. No, I thought, they love each other, they love their family. It would not be selfish, for it was communicated openly, they were done having children. It was time and it was supported. It was about love on all sides. Pure and simple when seen as something pure and simple.
So I kept them together, the family happy and embracing. It was just their new reality, for he…she was still their father. Still her wife. Love was love. For in the end it comes down to the person, the people, not the parts.
We love people not organs. Love by any other name would still taste as sweet…and isn’t to receive love and the ability to give love what souls are all about?